KASUMIGAOKA
2017/08/27 SERMON: “The Family of an Elder Above Reproach” 「非難されるところがない長老の家族」
TEXT: Titus 1: 5‐9
I.INTRODUCTION
Last week we considered the necessity of choosing elders in every church according to the directions that Paul had given to Titus. Without the right elders to lead the churches in Crete, the churches could not be properly organized and established. The apostle Paul continues in Titus 1: 6-9 to explain to Titus what kind of men should be elected and installed as elders in the churches. These verses, like the verses in 1 Timothy 3:2-7, contain a list of attributes that men whom God has prepared for the eldership must possess. For that reason this has been called a list of “qualifications” for eldership. However, we must realize that this is not a complete list. There are many important attributes which a man called to be elder must have that are not contained in this short list. For example, we know that “unless one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God” (John 3:3). But Paul says nothing about this most basic requirement of the Christian life! He says nothing about faith in Jesus Christ, His atoning death, or His resurrection! Nor does Paul say anything about choosing elders who are “full of the Holy Spirit and of wisdom” like the men chosen to serve as deacons in Acts 6:3. But just because these qualities are not mentioned here, can we assume that they are not essential requirements for elders? Of course not! All elders must show that they belong to Christ because they have been redeemed by His blood. They must show that they are men who believe in Christ risen from the dead! And they must be men of humble repentance who understand how much they need Christ’s forgiveness of their sins. They must prove their faith by their words and their actions. Their lives must show evidence of their Christian maturity by bearing the fruit of the Spirit in all of their human relationships. All of these things are necessary conditions for anyone to be called to serve as an elder. But they are not listed here. So we must realize that this is not a complete list.
However, the qualities the apostle lists here are some of the outward, visible evidences of a man’s inner spiritual condition. Paul focuses on a man’s reputation both outside of, and within, the church. Paul says that a man equipped by God to be elder will be “above reproach.” Why is this so important? I think it is important because of the position of an elder in Christ’s church. An elder—whether a teaching elder or a ruling elder—is one who stands “in Christ’s place” at the head of the congregation. As Peter explains in 1 Peter 5:4, the Lord Jesus is the “Chief Shepherd” of the congregation, but the elders are also “shepherds” sent by Him to guard and lead the flock. Elders are Christ’s representatives whom He has prepared and given to His church. An elder’s most important duty is to serve Christ and to carry out His work among the members of the church. Elders must therefore do nothing that will cause men to doubt the goodness and the righteousness of their Chief Shepherd. For this reason, Paul says, in vv. 6 and 7, that an “overseer [elder] must be above reproach.” That is, his reputation must be excellent.
The qualities Paul lists here in verses 6-9 may be grouped under three headings: “above reproach in his family,” “above reproach in his church,” and “above reproach in his doctrine.” Today I want to consider the first of these—“above reproach in his family.”
II. AN ELDER MUST BE ABOVE REPROACH IN HIS FAMILY (v. 6)
This is the first requirement that the apostle mentions, and this may surprise some people. Many churches, for example, consider a man’s role in the larger community to be more important than his relationship to his own family. I have known some churches (even Reformed Presbyterian churches) that would elect a man as elder simply because he was well-educated and held a responsible position, such as doctor, lawyer, banker, or professor. This is a serious mistake. By emphasizing a man’s social position, or reputation at his workplace, people may overlook a much more important question. That question is, “What is this man’s reputation within his own family?” Is he the spiritual leader in his home? Does he give proper attention and love to his wife and children? A man may be honored in the community and respected in his company, but be completely negligent as a husband and father! Such a man lacks the first basic requirement for becoming an elder; that is, being “above reproach” in his family life.
Before we look more carefully at v. 6, we should consider whether being “above reproach” in his family life means that a man must be married with children in order to be elected an elder. Are single men not eligible to be elected elders? It is possible to find men in the Scriptures who were respected as “elders,” but were neither fathers, nor married. Probably Boaz in the Old Testament, and the apostle Paul himself in the New Testament could be given as examples. In most cases, there is no clear record of family relationships among the apostles, or among the fellow-workers of the apostles, such as Titus, Timothy, Silas, or Mark. We do know that Peter and some of the other apostles were married. But Paul emphasizes being “above reproach,” rather than “being married with children.” Marriage is an excellent place to test one’s gifts for the eldership. Usually, men who would be candidates for the office of elder would be “older men,” and in that culture such men would have normally married and raised children. So, I think this passage means that marriage and fatherhood provide a good opportunity to reveal a man’s character and faith. But, if a man is not married and is not a father, he may still be qualified to become an elder, if he is in his personal relationships “above reproach.”
What does the apostle tell us about married men who may be qualified for the eldership? First, Paul writes that he must be a “man of one woman.” There is no word in Greek that expresses the idea of “husband” in distinction from “male.” The word used here is “man.” It is sad that so many churches have been misled by poor exegesis and modern prejudices to reject what the Bible says so clearly about the gender of elders. An elder must be “a man,” and not a woman. What sort of man? He must be a “one-woman man.” I think the apostle is simply referring to what the book of Genesis tells us, and what the Lord of the church quoted in Matthew 19:4-6. Jesus said to some Pharisees, “Have you not read, that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh’? Consequently, they are no more two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” There is Jesus’ simple definition of marriage. It is the union of one man and one woman who become one new “being” as a married couple. It is a healthy marriage, because both function together in harmony. They are like a single organism—“one flesh”—and they work together for the common good of the couple and their children. It is not a union that will be dissolved, except by death. It is a marriage that has been joined together by God! “What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” If a married man does not have this kind of stable, harmonious, and enduring relationship with his wife, he should not be considered for the eldership.
Perhaps one more matter should be inferred from this idea of a “one-woman man.” It is that a married couple, as a single “body,” must have only one “head.” Occasionally, an animal will be born with tragic birth defects. In the Motomachi shopping street (underneath the railroad tracks) there is a small shop with a strange display. It is a stuffed [剥製の] pig with two heads. Such animals cannot live very long. Neither will a marriage survive very long, if the man and woman who have become “one flesh” try to live with two “heads.” Ephesians 5:23 says, “For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.” In a marriage created and blessed by God, there will be “one flesh” and one “head.” And the “one-woman man” who is qualified to be an elder in Christ’s church will be the “head” of his marital “body.” This means that the godly husband will love his wife as Christ loved the church, and gave Himself up for her (Eph. 5:25). Ordinarily, in every important family decision, such a couple will seek agreement; but on those rare occasions when perfect agreement cannot soon be reached, the wife will willingly follow the decision of her husband. I believe that this is what Paul means by the expression “a one-woman man.” If a man is partner and head of such a blessed marriage, his married life will not be “reproached” by the surrounding community.
But if there are children born to such a marriage, the children are a very important part of the family. Often a man’s reputation in the community is stained, if his children do not behave in an upright manner. Psalm 127 describes the family life of those who are blessed by the Lord. “They shall not be ashamed, when they speak with their enemies in the gate.” The gate of the city was the place where the elders gathered to make decisions. If a man’s children did not behave well, his enemies would criticize him before the elders, because of his children’s behavior. In that case, he would be put to shame in public. But when a man’s children are well-mannered and obedient, his enemies will have nothing to criticize or complain about. Such a man is blessed because he has raised his children to be “above reproach.” But Paul says more than the Psalm tells us. Paul says that a man who is qualified to be an elder should have “children who believe.” This is a more difficult condition than merely having well-behaved children. There must be a spiritual element in the training of his children, not merely a moral element. I think this means that there should be “spiritual fruit” in a man’s family. A godly father should guide his children by his words and example to trust in Jesus Christ for their salvation. A man’s family is the first place he should focus his prayers and his witness. It must be the goal of every faithful father to lead his own children to God’s throne of grace. But how hard it is to do that! Our children see our sins and our weaknesses every day. So, it is a wonderful testimony to God’s grace when any children come to share their parents’ faith. That is the evidence that God is preparing a man to be an elder. Paul does not say that “all” of a man’s children must be believers. But if not even one child in a family has been persuaded to believe in Christ by a faithful father, there may be reason to question his spiritual qualifications to be an elder.
The last condition mentioned in verse 6 is that “they not be accused of dissipation or rebellion.” Most commentators believe these words refer to a man’s children. However, nothing in the Greek sentence indicates that it refers to the children, rather than to the father himself. Possibly both are intended. If a father is not careful of his speech, his use of time and money, his truthfulness, and his reliability in his own home, his colleagues at the office or friends at church may not know it. But his children at home will know! And even worse, they will usually follow his example. If these words refer specifically to his children, then the meaning is very close to what we see in 1 Timothy 3: 4-5. “He must be one who manages his own household well, keeping his children under control with all dignity. (But if a man does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of the church of God?)” Here we can see the clear connection between the way a man cares for his own family and the way he should care for “God’s household, which is the church of the living God” (1 Tim. 3:15). A man’s family is the place where he must learn the skills and prove his gifts to lead Christ’s church. If a man cannot shepherd his own family in a manner that is “above reproach,” then how can he shepherd the church of God?
III. CONCLUSION
As we conclude our study of this first “qualification” for the eldership, let’s remember why a man’s relationships to his wife and to his children are so important to the office of elder. The most important quality which a man must have in order to be an effective elder is a heart that is devoted to God. One of the best ways to see a man’s true nature is by observing how he treats those people who are nearest to his heart—that is, his wife and children. Most men love their families. But only a mature Christian man will understand that the best way to love his family is by leading them to Christ. A mature Christian man will show his love for Christ in the way he shepherds his own family. He will study the Scriptures not just to know what the Bible says, but to do what it says! He will apply the teaching of God’s word in his own home. He will understand that only by leading his family according to God’s word will he bring God’s blessing and peace into his home. In a man’s family relationships his faith, his character, and his gifts for ministry will be revealed. That is why a man’s family is the first place we should look when we are thinking about choosing an elder.
Family life is not easy. We face many challenges when we try to “build” a Christian home. It requires a lot of humble prayer. It requires careful study and application of God’s word. It requires bold and confident leadership, so that our families will be kept safe from the many dangers that exist in the world. In his family life a man must learn how to depend upon the Lord for wisdom, protection, and grace. In his family a man learns the practical truth expressed in Psalm 127: “Except the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain who build it; unless the Lord guards the city, the watchman keeps awake in vain.” A man who has learned this is a man you will want to choose for your elder. Next week we will go on to consider two other conditions which a man chosen to be elder must meet.